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The "optional" part has nothing to do with the hosting level of the event, but rather, whether the gentlemen wear a tux or not

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[21] Once Yale opened to women, however, the club quickly followed suit on July 30, 1969, [21] although the club did not open its bar, dining room, or athletic facilities to women until 1974 [22] and did not open its swimming pool (known as "the plunge") to women until 1987

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DaVinci Bridesmaids Style # 60400: Satin A-Line Bridesmaid Dress, Sweetheart Neckline, Arched Strap Detail, Floor Length Skirt

If you want to keep your look casual, pair your white dress with a pair of black Chuck Taylors